Shop More Submit  Join Login
About Traditional Art / Hobbyist Member IttyBittyTidbitsFemale/Philippines Groups :icondrawforme: Drawforme
Where your OCs can be drawn
Recent Activity
Deviant for 2 Years
Needs Premium Membership
Statistics 151 Deviations 1,324 Comments 5,844 Pageviews

Newest Deviations



When I was young, somebody I loved very much broke a water glass. I went to make sure she was unhurt and asked, “Am I good?” 

She said I was, because I rushed to her aid. 

But I did what I did because I loved her very much, not because I was good. Now that I don’t love her as much as I used to, I no longer go, not even when she calls. 

I like to think that no longer loving a person doesn’t mean I’m bad, but I can’t shake off the feeling that over the years, I’ve turned into a monster. 

  • Mood: Guilty
  • Listening to: Il Divo
He heard it just as he was about to round the corner back to his office after lunch break. A couple of the new interns were loitering in the halls, gossiping in hushed tones about their superiors. Ivan heard a sigh about how hellish it was to be asked to bring a document from the Minister of Interior's desk. Apparently, it was "a disaster". 

He was halfway to a chuckle when he caught his name and paused, half a step frozen in mid-air. 

A female intern tittered, "Oh, everybody has a crush on Mr. Braginski!"

Her friends laughed. "I heard from the Prime Minister's secretary that his girlfriend is frightening!"

"His aides say he's sweet on her."

"Mr. Braginski is sweet to everybody."

"Except the politicians."

That was followed by a louder, free-er laugh. Then a smaller voice said, "I think he has favourites."

"The old ones?"

Ivan imagined a shrug. "Maybe? He's seems old-fashioned, don't you think?"

The forthcoming murmur of agreement was interrupted by the chiming of the hour from the old waterclock at the foyer down the hall. The interns hastily said their goodbyes and scattered back to their posts in a clatter of feet.

Ivan put down his suspended mid-step and sighed as he trudged back to his office. His children thought he was old.


The thought remained with him for the rest of the day, casting a cloud of gloom over his head. He shuffled his feet as he pondered his file cabinet. When his aide came in with the Quarterly Report from the Minister of Interior, Ivan studied the young man as flatly asked,

"Am I old?"

The poor boy's eyes widened into saucers and he stammered, clearly thrown off, "S-S-Sir?"

"Never mind," Ivan said at last, the word "mid-life crisis" suddenly flashing through his mind. He stuck the report at the bottom of his to-do pile.


Five-thirty on the dot, he was retrieving his coat and wondering whether he should trade in the beige trench for a black leather jacket when you swirled into his office, all smiles and ruddy cheeks and a ruffled pink coat.

"I'm taking you out tonight~" you sang, throwing your arms around him in greeting.

"You are?" he repeated, spirits slightly lifting.

"Yup. But technically, it's 'us'. I mean, it's really 'we're' taking you out tonight."


"Po-Po's dropped by and wants a walk around town before he jets over to Bali. So we're all taking him out."

"Po-Po?" Ivan echoed, feeling very lost.

"Poland, Polska, Feliks, Po-Po!"

His face crumpled into the beginnings of a pout. He had one arm in his coat, but had stopped, as if suddenly drained of all will to go on. "Why can't Liet do it himself?"

"Because poor guy!" you laughed, helping Ivan into his trench. "Feliks will talk, talk, talk his ears off! Besides, it's nice to be neighbourly. Hospitable. Whatever." As the last button slid into place, you prodded him out the door.

"Let's go. Aren't you excited to see the night life?"

Ivan suppressed his umpteenth sigh of the day. He felt old. He felt it in his bones.


"So, like, duh, the boss-man doesn't know!" Poland rolled his eyes, laughing devilishly. "No way in hell am I going to sit in a stuffy meeting room while the shores of Bali beckon outside the window!"

"You can't lie to your boss like that!" Lithuania gasped.

He got a dismissive wave in return. "I'm not using state funds, anyway. Just flying off for a well-deserved break. What the-boss man doesn't know won't kill him. Maybe just give him an anger-stroke!" He cackled.

Lithuania drained his glass of wine.

"You should totally come" Poland went on, addressing you. "It isn't too late to book tickets yet. And I've got room to spare in my hotel suite."

"Sounds lovely," you said, "but Vanya's in his busy season. I hate to leave without him." A cursory sideways glance showed that said Vanya was in a stupor, staring across the room at a group of friends busy taking selfies while they waited for their food to arrive. 

Poland only shrugged. As he waxed poetic about his upcoming trip, you took the chance to nudge Russia's untouched glass of vodka towards him. He blinked, looked down long enough to wrap his fingers around it, and then returned to studying the group of friends at the back of the dining hall. After a moment of two, he leaned towards you and quietly asked,

"What are they doing?"

"Oh. Just taking selfies."

His brow furrowed. "I'm sorry, I don't quite..."

"They're taking pictures of themselves," you tried again, beaming as understanding dawned across his face. He straightened, and then,


You shrugged. "To share it on Instagram?"

He shook his head.

"Social media? Like Facebook? Or vKontakte?"

"Ah." He knew that much.

Silence again passed between you. Ivan was still immensely interested in the group, but this time, between sips of vodka. You were beginning to tune back to Feliks' chatter when Ivan gave a little gasp. A couple among the friends had posed together, the man pecking his girlfriend on the mouth as she snapped a photo.

"They share that online, too?" Ivan mused.

"Some couples do."


"To...I don't know. Stake their claim?" you laughed. "Show the world they're together?"

It didn't take long for Ivan to ponder this. His "Ah" of understanding was almost sagely.


The morning after Poland was a scramble. Everyone had stumbled home at three in the morning, some more drunk than the others. A tipsy Poland had crashed onto the living room couch. At seven in the morning, you were dashing hither thither while a hysterical Lithuania pleaded with Poland to get up and get sober. His boss had found out about his plans to jump ship at Bali and was yelling threats audible from the receiver in Lithuania's hand. 

Russia was remarkably calm. He went about his business like he had all the time in the world, and even stopped you on the way to work for a long, lingering morning kiss. For luck, he said, and got an extra kiss for being so sweet. Both of you were all smiles as you went your separate ways, but Ivan was extra-pleased.

It wasn't until noon that you learned why, or why your boss gave you raised eyebrows and your staff their knowing smiles.

Ivan had instagrammed your morning kiss and captioned it, "Staking my claim". 

In a moment of blind panic, you logged on to Facebook to assess the damage. The photo was at the top of the newsfeeds, with a dizzying number of likes, and way too many congratulatory messages from the rest of the world. Even Norway had taken the time to leave a winking smiley!

You scrolled down to leave a complaint when you spotted China's blazing red display photo. He had written a scathing comment half in Mandarin and half in English, all caps. You surmised that the words in Mandarin were none too diplomatic. To say China was raging mad over Russia's "improper" display and in his failing "his obligation to preserve your purity" was saying the least. He demanded that the photo be taken down and that Russia issue an official apology.

In response, "Don't be jealous," Russia wrote back, "that I am more hip than you are."


Ivan mused that despite the negative reactions (from China, South Korea, Japan, and Vietnam), the response was overwhelmingly positive.

PLUS he had shown the world that you were his and most definitely his.

AND it was clear, that he had owned social media completely.

He closed his laptop, wriggled the Quarterly Report from underneath his to-do pile, and began to read, a big smile on his face.

He was SO not old-fashioned. 
100 Themes Challenge 77: Test
Who even still uses the word "hip" these days????

It's a headcanon that Ivan can be an old man. I think it's cute when he tries to be "hip". 

Official titles and everything are made up. I don't even know if there's such a thing as Ministry of Interior in Russia. :p It was inspired by our own Department of Interior.

As to why the Prime Minister's secretary thinks you're scary, it's in reference to one of my drafts for an earlier Chapter (chapter 21) where you stake out the Prime Minister's office to coerce him into giving Russia vacation leave. No particular person is alluded to as PM, of course, but the idea is that the Prime Minister is scary, so you're not scared of him, you've got to be reeeeeaaaaaalllllllyyyyyy scary. 
Ivan hates the sound of breaking glass.

He has an odd collection on his mantel - fading photographs still in their ancient frames, miscellaneous medals he said weren't his, an Imperial military officer's cap, a sabre, and, in the front centre of it all, a glass flute, small, of frosted glass. He never mentioned its history, but every time he set eyes on it, a nostalgic little smile would cross his face. 

It happened one rainy day. You were in the backyard when suddenly you felt the ground tremble beneath you. 


The shaking jarred from one heart-stopping second into another, growing mightier until you could hear the clink of porcelain from the kitchen window. Suddenly roused, you dashed inside, calling out for the others. And that's when you heard the smash from the den.

"Ivan!" you called, abruptly redirecting your steps. You knew Ivan was in the den. He loved to stand by the hearth on cold, rainy days. Your heart stuttered in your chest. The crystal chandelier above you swayed dangerously. 

"Vanya!" You skid around the next corner, bracing yourself with the door frame as you came to a sudden halt. He was kneeling with his back to you. "Vanya, hurry! Get out of the -" And then as abruptly as it began, the shaking, the vibrating, the horrid clinking, all flowed to a stop. Sounds of activity burst from another part of the house. Everyone was all right.

He continued to kneel. 

You took a couple of cautious steps towards him. "Ivan? What's the matter? Did...did you hurt yoursel-" You gasped, and then lunged forward. "Careful with that!"

His glass flute had fallen from the mantel and he was haphazardly picking up the shards. Rivulets of red criss-crossed his palm. You grabbed his wrist, but when you attempted to remove the fragments, Ivan jerked away, fingers closing over his palm, over sharp edges of glass.

"Careful!" you all but pleaded.

He couldn't speak. He didn't move, distress frozen on his face, blood dripping from his cut-up hand while you clung to his other, limp, arm.

"Come now," you begged. "Leave that, please. Leave it. Let me dress your wounds."

It took a while, but he was eventually persuaded and followed you to the couch. You hurried away to find a wash cloth and the first aid kit and returned to find him still sitting, looking like a child soldier who had just killed his first man.

You worked wordlessly, meticulously tweezing every last bit of shattered glass from his palm. He did not react, did not even flinch when you rinsed the lacerations with bubbling peroxide. It was only when you were wrapping up his hand that he slumped onto you, suddenly weary. He squeezed his eyes shut. 

"I hate it."

"Hate what?" You kissed the soft mop of blonde on your shoulder.

"That. Things breaking. Glass breaking." A shiver coursed through the bear of a man pressed to you. He seemed to curl up, just like a puppy scared of a thunderstorm, and pressed his lips closed.

You kissed him again.

"It is so silly, da? So, so...stupid." He laughed, hollowly. "I used to love it. Breaking glass. It used to be," he breathed, "my favourite sound."

You finished with his hand, put aside the first aid kit, and shifted so that you were half-lying together.

"In spring, cadets would take their oaths and drink to becoming the new officers of the military. The Czar would lead them in a toast, and then their glasses would be dashed to the ground." He paused, feeling around the memory. "In the bright morning of early spring, it was the best sound in the world. Reassuring. I always thought that as long as those vodka glasses crashed on the ground, the Empire would live forever. That I could live forever."

"You're still here," you murmured, petting his hair.

He fell silent. After a while, his breathing slowed to a rhythm so peaceful you thought he had fallen asleep. But as you caressed his bandaged hand, his fingers twitched under yours and he let out a shallow sigh.

"It isn't fair."

He led them in a toast once. He watched those boys grow up.

And then the bombs went off. The fighting turned into losing. Their song of brotherhood, their loyalty, went up in flames, until at last their bloodied blue and red sank in a sea of cascading rainbow glass.

It makes Ivan think he did it.
100 Themes Challenge 76: Broken Pieces
half-half on this one at first because I didn't want to write another hurt/comfort theme. But after letting it sit a few hours, the niggling idea of it wouldn't leave me and in a spot of compromise, I cut out a bit of the last part and turned it into Ivan's sad little secret.

the officers and the glass breaking is take directly from the movie The Barber of Siberia (first important scene on part 2 if you're watching on youtube). I didn't bother to check if it was historically accurate because I thought it was such a beautiful ceremony and didn't want my hopes dashed. haha...

I'll try to write a happier one next time. :)

When I was young, somebody I loved very much broke a water glass. I went to make sure she was unhurt and asked, “Am I good?” 

She said I was, because I rushed to her aid. 

But I did what I did because I loved her very much, not because I was good. Now that I don’t love her as much as I used to, I no longer go, not even when she calls. 

I like to think that no longer loving a person doesn’t mean I’m bad, but I can’t shake off the feeling that over the years, I’ve turned into a monster. 

  • Mood: Guilty
  • Listening to: Il Divo


IttyBittyTidbits's Profile Picture
Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
A business graduate who has strayed into the world of art.
I write, draw, paint, and cosplay.
I've been drawing since I was six, wanted to be a writer since seven, and have been cosplaying for two years now.
New to dA and is therefore in constant need of guidance. Please be kind! <:)

AdCast - Ads from the Community



Add a Comment:
viospace Featured By Owner May 25, 2014
thank you so much for the watch~Heart :iconcrazyginplz:
IttyBittyTidbits Featured By Owner May 25, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Don't mention it. It's my pleasure! ^^"
viospace Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2014
Lady--Nyx Featured By Owner May 15, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist


My dearest friend, I HOPE THAT TODAY IS A WONDERFUL DAY FOR YOU AND THAT UR WHOLE YEAR IS BLESSED!! Spend today with everyone who loves you and may God's light shine on you and may you be forever happy!

Eat lots of cake and have a piece for me! ^_~

IttyBittyTidbits Featured By Owner May 19, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you, Aki-chan!!!!!! >3< I did have a wonderful (and also very surprising) day! ^^" Cheers to more years of friendship!!!! :D
Lady--Nyx Featured By Owner May 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Did you get a surprise party thrown for you? (i personally cant stand those) But if thats the case, i hope you had fun! :la:
IttyBittyTidbits Featured By Owner May 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
we had a dinner, and my parents invited some of my closest friends over. I didn't know and was head-over-heels happy because it was my secret wish! xD and two of those friends brought flowers, which was another secret wish granted! hahahahaha! God really does work inn mysterious ways! xD
(1 Reply)
crystal-infinity Featured By Owner May 5, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey! Thank you so much for the fave and the watch! I appreciate it a lot! :tighthug:
IttyBittyTidbits Featured By Owner May 5, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Dont mention it.. ^^" It was my pleasure entirely. Your works are so beautiful! Congrats on the DD! d>.<b
crystal-infinity Featured By Owner May 6, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
;A; :heart: :tighthug: thank you so much. I will definitely keep trying my best!
Add a Comment: